I do not have sexual needs, as far back as I can recall I never really did. Or, the scenario rather is: I never had a large sex drive, but it was certainly more than it currently is.
My wife does have sexual desires and she is longing for sexual activity with me. I just don’t have an interest in being sexual with my wife, although I did at one time.
The fact is, married women too experience sexual deprivation.
Whether you are a man or a woman, yearning for sexual intimacy with your spouse is a healthy desire.
Is it that she does not have sexual desires at all? I too feel a ministry birthing, but I fear that the lack of spontaneity in my marriage can be a problem. She gives me sex, actually after foreplay she gets into it. It becomes a style, a pattern due to years of the same start, during and stop process.
Clearly, I’m not satisfied in the area of our sex life. If you are willing to put aside the emotions you may be feeling in connection with her not taking action on making a change. If you can consider this: how can I interact in an intimate way, in a sexual way, in an interactive way today, tomorrow, the next day and onward…
Perhaps over time as you provide a sexual intimate experience for your spouse you too will see that sexual intimacy is for you too. Shows include: Ingraham Angle, Your World With Neil Cavuto, Coast To Coast, Hannity, O'Reilly Factor, Real Story With Gretchen Carlson, America's Newsroom, America's News HQ, FOX & Friends, FOX & Friends FIRST, America Live, Willis Report, John Stossel, and more. It would be interesting to know if she views the sexual relationship in marriage as an important part of having a healthy connected marriage. Rather, perhaps if she and you were to read this blog together, as well as the commentary in response to this article, it may open up a dialogue beyond what the two of you have experienced prior to this blog. For marriage is sacred, a beautiful gift that can grow over time when the plant of marriage is watered. Karen Reply Hello I need help, been married for over twenty years. You mention you are the initiator and you start in the same spot. If she is not taking action, it may very well be on you to take action. To interact during the sexual encounter differently.
For now though, for the purposes of the particular focus of this blog – do it for your spouse. Or, does she views a man’s desire for his wife as something other than healthy? My wife and i are devote Christians with Three Teenage boys. You see, a couple’s sexual style is just that: a style.
Continue to keep the lines of communication with your spouse open and figure out as a marital team what can be done about this particular challenge. If I try to say anything to improve our sex life she immediately becomes defensive and says “Maybe you should find somebody who has nothing better to do.” Which breaks my heart because I would never want to do that to her. I’m a senior minister in a growing church thats depending on my integrity and leadership. Haven’t cheated, but I’m baffled that men who do get a bad wrap, when the faithful, bill paying, cooking father gets frustration. You are certainly doing the right thing by communicating with her in an honest way that you are longing for more.Rather than the relationship continue to decline and disconnect sexually as the years continue, take action.Case Scenario B: I do not have much of a sexual drive.Just as you would converse about any other challenge, tackle it together… Don’t sweep sexual intimacy under the rug and ignore it. Like most ignored topics, it surfaces out in other ways and/or will eventually lead to an outcome that is not a happy one. Take your man, take your woman, kiss them, caress them, feed them this meal they are so hungry for. Media Psychotherapist Guest Expert; Relationships, Parenting, Human Behavior, Analyzes Timely Topics In The News. Married 26 years and sex has been a minefield of ok times and bad blow ups. I have worked for 25 years to reach this point in my career and I feel it has trapped me in a marriage I sometimes wish I could change. You mention that other spiritual women have shared with her but there’s been no improvement.If your spouse is sexually deprived, do something about it. And then, feel good that you did something for your spouse. Appears nationally on FOX News Channel and FOX Business Network. Additionally has appeared on: ABC's GMA, Lifetime, Discovery Network, MTV, Steve Harvey TV Show, and more. Karen provides her expertise on: NBC News Boston, NECN, ABC Boston, FOX News Boston; Ask Dr. Reply Thank you for taking the time to share your story Mark. I am hopeful that your writing in response to this article may open the door to a healthy dialogue between you and your wife. As a husband who loves his wife to have her suggest you look elsewhere, I am sure hurts you greatly and invalidates your needs. I would suggest that you consider starting in a different spot. You mention lunch hours and times when you are alone that sexual thoughts or gestures don’t come to her.Those married men and women who are sexually deprived often feel guilty expressing their disappointment, since in all other ways they feel so blessed. So, I will be the voice for those sexually deprived husbands and wives and state: your desire to have a healthy sexual relationship with your spouse is just that – healthy. Sigh….fourth night in a row I had been promised sex and another cancellation.